If you’ve read the comments section of my recent post Games, Puzzles and Lies, you may have noticed that I claim Alf Stewart is my God. This is not strictly true; part of the remit of Sherby57 is to investigate all new religions, and the best way to assess them is to live them. At present, I am fully committed to being Alfian.
Alf Stewart is a long-running character in popular tea-time Aussie soap-opera, Home And Away. He has portrayed by veteran actor Ray Meagher since 1988. Followers of the religion have come to believe that Alf Stewart, the character, exists in the real world, and that he is roaming the earth looking for the true Summer Bay. There have been many sightings of blessed Alf over the years, but they mostly turn out to be Meagher popping down the shops. It gets quite confusing that they look exactly the same.
For the dedicated Alfian, every day starts by reciting the Alf Stewart prayer:
Our Father, who art in the surf club,
Alf Stewart be thy name.
Thy Ailsa come,
thy will be a great gullah,
on earth as it is in Summer Bay
Give us this day our flaming mongrels.
And forgive us our trespasses,
as, strewth, we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into the diner,
but deliver us from Don Fisher.
For thine is the kingdom, the power and the glory. for ever and ever.
Stone the flamin’ crows.
Amen
I can’t believe you stole my god!
And you sank my battleship!
How can you steal a divine concept? It’s for everybody.
I thought Alf was my gag?! I know he’s here for everone to wonder at, but still…
A gag?? You’ll be going straight to Yabbie Creek for that kind of blasphemy!!! Alfred H. Stewart!
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