The World of Sherby57

Because I’m worth it

Post From The Past – December 2008

I hate Post From The Past.  Why on earth did I start doing it? I now feel compelled to continue.  It’s like a form of eternal damnation.  That said, please enjoy this month’s offering:

14. Post From The Past – December 2007 – This contains a few classic posts such as Mike Robot, some blokes on a see-saw, and some Mr Banana-Penis madness.

13. My Art – Elephant Helmet – It’s a helmet on an elephant.

12. My Art – Helmet Elephant – It’s an elephant on a helmet.

11. Christmas Do –  This photograph perfectly sums up what it feels like to be the table at a ‘Christmas do’.

10. Post From The Past – Best of 2007 – This is allegedly a collection of the best posts from 2007.  There are some good ones, so it’s worth checking out.

9. Uninspired – A Poem – A slice of lucid jazz poetry that neatly sums up what it feels like to be completely uninspired.

8. Postal Strike – A controversial post that was both ‘a post’ and ‘not a post’.  This one will baffle philosophy students for years to come.

7. 10 Things You Never Knew About Sherby57 – You didn’t know them, but you do now.

6. Starship Champy –  This is kind of an avant garde poem and a big, teasing riddle.  If you can work out what it all means then you’re a bona fide genius.

5. The Sherby57 On TV Ultimatum – This features a review of everybody’s favourite game show, Fear My Clit.

4. A Hazard of Parsnips – Chapters 3 & 4 – An emotional powerhouse of a novel.  Read it and literally weep.

3. Fireheart! The Movie – Meet the Director – The lazy sod still hasn’t released the film.  The fans are becoming rabid.

2. My Art – Doctor Angel – This is an artist’s impression of the good doc.  But, that artist is me, so it doesn’t look anything like her.  It’s more metaphorical, actually.  It’s not supposed to look like her.

1. Show Me Magic – It’s a drawing, it’s a poem, it’s a biting satire of the ridiculousness of religion.  What more could you want?

Disclaimer – This is an extremely self-indulgent feature and is a cynical attempt to recycle stuff that I have written in the past in the vain hope that someone will actually read them. Please feel free to slag off “Post From The Past” to your hearts content.

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Straight Outta Swansea

Some of you may remember the post MC Lizzy Duke, from October last year, in which I discussed the hit song “Straight Outta Swansea”.

Well, my good friend Dr Angel and her band 123 Bumming! have done an amazing cover version of the song.  I urge you to go listen to it by following the link below:

http://www.reverbnation.com/tunepak/2040331

I mean it.  Go listen to it now.

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Oh Doctor, Where Art Thou?

The more observant amongst you will have noticed the absence of Dr Angel recently. The doc is a good friend of mine and a regular contributor to the blog, so I’ve been curious as to her whereabouts.

The most popular theory is that she’s been recruited by the monks of Sherby57 for a black ops mission. It must be a bloody secret one if I don’t know about it. I can only think that she’s been sent to sabotage the Sherby666 trade delegation to Sherby45347 as they hope to sell them pickled onions as artificial hearts. We all know that onions are the worst pickle to use for organ replacement. The absolute rotters.

If this is the mission that she’s been sent on then I probably shouldn’t be publishing details on it for worldwide consumption. Forget I said anything.

Doc, come back soon.

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Post From The Past – October 2008

Like a one-man curtain-twitching squad, I return to bring you the best posts from October 2008.  Actually, it’s all of them.

12. Post From The Past – October 2007 – A look back at a packed month, which included: some poems, slagging off Bullseye, something about Mr Burley, Mr Quiff and much, much more. Check it out now, puncho rudder.

11. Search Me – A look at some of the search terms that brought people to Sherby57.  These include ‘emmerdale hardcore anal’ and ‘green bear+the nuzzler’.  Utterly baffling.

10. My Art – More IPhone People – Some portraits done on an iPhone.  One day, the true identities of these people will be revealed.

9. Toast Of The Town – A look back at the whole Toastergate scandal, one of the most harrowing episodes in recent Warrington history.

8. Join Cozzy’s Club! – It seems that I was the only person who could remember the old TV show, Cozzy’s Club.  That’s why I publicised its new web-site.  Sadly, although the web-site still exists, it hasn’t been updated for quite some time.

7. MC Lizzy Duke – A link to the lyrics of MC Lizzy Duke’s hit rap track, Straight outta Swansea.  A seminal classic.

6. A Hazard of Parsnips – An Experiment – A post which heralded the arrival of one of the most-loved and cutting edge works of fiction of the twenty-first century.

5. Waugh On Corruption – Disturbing news about an attempt to rig a poll about one of my jokes.

4. A Hilarious A-Team Joke – An exceptionally funny joke about one of the members of The A-Team, even if I do say o myself.  You even have the opportunity to vote on how good you think it is.  Currently the voting is: Hilarious, 37%; Funny, 16%; Rubbish, 47%.  Please see item 5 on why the ‘Rubbish’ category is doing so well.  If you want to aid justice, go vote.

3. Me Weak – My exploits with my friend, Bontempi, stranded in an igloo, bombarded by orbs.

2. Richie Cunningham’s Hair – An otherworldly adventure prompted by my ponderment of Richie Cunningham’s barnet.

1. A Hazard of Parsnips – Chapters 1 & 2 – The first two chapters of the classic novel. You read them, you loved them, you want to read them again.  When will the next chapter arrive? I’m afraid you’ll have to ask Dr Angel.

Disclaimer – This is an extremely self-indulgent feature and is a cynical attempt to recycle stuff that I have written in the past in the vain hope that someone will actually read them. Please feel free to slag off “Post From The Past” to your hearts content.


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Dimension Hopping: Day 5 – Smelling The Hyperspace Fart

It’s not been a pleasant day.  If you think that normal trumps smell awful, then you should try having a whiff of a hyperspace one.  Bloody awful.

Hans, Sally and myself joined our Sherby44 colleagues, George, Harold and Queeege on a trip in to the unknown.  That sounds more dramatic than it actually is; in a universe where everything is energy, every journey is in to the unknown.  It’s par for the course.  There wasn’t a lot of conversation on our voyage to the fart, Hans was still mooning over Dr Angel and Sally was sulking.  At one point, I thought she was going to cast a spell on Hans, but she’s a professional and pulled herself together.  Having no frame of reference, it was difficult to put a distance on our journey or how long it took.  With the tense atmosphere, it seemed like forever.

We could smell the fart before we could see it, but it was a telepathic smell rather than a physical one, and this means you can’t even hold your nose.  I passed out at one point as my body struggled to acclimatise.  By the time I recovered, we were there.   We started with the most obvious solution – coordinated mental battering.  We each reached a zen-like trance and started to kick the fart’s metaphorical ass.  Despite several centuries combined experience, we didn’t even make a dent.  It was then that Hans came to his senses and suggested the horrific answer, we were going to have to plug it manually.

As it required a phyisical solution, it was down to the Sherby57 gang to step to the plate, and our n0n-corporeal brethren telekinetically launched us at the offending stink!  It was like being fired straight up Satan’s bum-hole.  But, it worked.  Hooray for smelly old us.

It also had the side effect of firing us in to a random universe, one that is ruled by The Lambot!

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