Man in the Vauxhall Corsa
With the Jesus fish symbol
Stuck to the boot
(of your Vauxhall Corsa)
Do you really think that Jesus
Would approve of your vehicular choice?
He’d probably prefer it if you walked
Or something like that
I believe he was like an old fashioned hippy
These are the sort of things
You need to consider
If you’re going to make such public demonstrations
Of your misguided beliefs
Via the medium
Of Jesus fish symbols
Stuck to the boot
Of your Vauxhall Corsa
When I first saw you
Next to that tiny man
I knew all at once
That I’d be your biggest fan
You’re tall with blonde hair
And beautiful, of course
I wish you’d look at me
The way you looked at that horse
You’re a gift to the world
Yes, you make us all sing
I wish you were mine
My Clare Balding
Overweight teenager
With your ill-fitting
Yet trendy
Clothes
And your face
Plastered in make up
When will you realise that
If anything
Your ill-fitting
Yet trendy
Clothes
And your face
Plastered in make up
Make you look more overweight
A salad
And a run
Would be a more effective
“looking slim”
Technique
Bernard emerged in adult form
From his mother’s womb
He’d been in there for many years
Because they just didn’t have the room.
See, when Bernie’s ma had given birth
She’d gone from you to “us”
But the council didn’t have a bigger flat
So his bedroom was a uterus.
It had been a lonely life
Which had led to deep depression
But Bernard had nowhere else to sleep
Because of this bloody recession
But now – at last – he is free
Yes, Bernie can share his stories
About his bijou living space
Caused by these bloody Tories.
The Review Show
On BBC2
Simultaneously intrigues
And makes me feel blue
They discuss the arts
Opinions they vent
It helps to tickle
My intellectual bent
I often drink
From their cerebral cup
But a lot of the time
I wish they’d fucking shut up
It's a book of this blog.
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| sherby57 on This Kid |
| misfits' miscellany on This Kid |
